Skip to main content

Emotional Bubble-Wrap for Young People Changing Homes




Moving can be hectic. It’s a contact sport. It’s physically and emotionally demanding at a time when you are supposed to still carry on the rest of life . . . jobs, dinner, rides to soccer. It’s a full-time job on top of a schedule that doesn’t have room for “another” job. So, in all of that, it’s easy to make mistakes with the kids and their involvement (or often lack-thereof) in the move.  As if there weren’t enough to think about, dealing with temper tantrums, outbursts, and sometimes intangible ways of fearful expressions, by kids in the middle of a move only adds to parental stress.  Below are some straightforward suggestions that parents can follow while moving children from one home to another. It all comes down to one fundamental component: involvement.
  • Let their wish-list be heard. Have kids identify what they love most about their current home and what they most want to see in a new home. Although this won’t erase all anxiety, there are often simple things that can be created to help with the child’s transition (e.g., a room color, a swing set, furniture you are moving with you anyway). 
 
  • Bring the kids to see the new property. Often, and understandably so, children are left with babysitters while parents view homes. Although this is logical for the hunt, once a property is under agreement and you know where specifically you are moving, set a time to go to the house. Between inspections, measurements, etc., there should be ample times when it’s appropriate for them to come to check it out.  At a minimum, this will allow their anxiety to be focused and hopefully more specifically identified than that of the unknown. This is also a good idea in respect to visiting a new school, if applicable.  

  • Let them pack.  Putting all the kids’ stuff in a box and telling them it will be at the next mysterious place creates uneasiness over what’s happening with their stuff.  In Lily and Andrew are Moving, a children’s book designed to identify and work with kids’ moving anxieties, each family member gets a “color.”  The color-coded stickers are then placed on that member’s belongings/boxes for easy identification for moving location. That same color is placed on that family members’ bedroom door for ease of identification. 
 
  • Prepare yourself for extra emotional outbursts and use them as a foundation for conversation. One of the biggest complaints I get from parents is that the kids’ behavior is very poor and it’s yet another stressor during a hectic time. Try to remember that everything going on and the stress you are feeling is undoubtedly affecting them. They may not know how to articulate why. Use these attention grabbers to, well, grab your attention and talk about the move with your child.
Most of all, just understand that the kids are moving, too. So, regardless of whether it’s a positive or negative move for the family, work through their reactions just as you do in your role as parent in any other life event. Trust, though, once everything is in motion, they are far more resilient than their adult counterparts.
Julie Etter is a professional, national award-winning realtor and former middle-school teacher based in Wrentham, MA. She is the author of Lily and Andrew Are Moving (Hardcover, $14.95; Kindle, $11.99), published by JT Publications, LLC. For more information, visit www.treehousebuddies.com

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Copycat Boston Pizza's Bandera Bread

Have you ever had a craving for something but then once you looked at it you realized, I can make that myself for next to nothing? That's how I felt last night I thought about ordering in some food but then realized I really don't want to spend any money. I really wanted pizza bread from Boston Pizza. So I recreated it and oh my goodness was it ever good. Try some of these great recipes too!  Pizza Bread Dough 1 cup warm water 1 tsp instant yeast 1 tsp sugar 2 cups flour  Seasoning 1 tbsp melted butter 1 tsp garlic powder 1 tsp onion salt 1 tsp parsley 1 tsp rosemary 1 tsp basil 1 tsp oregano 1/2 tsp sugar 1. Combine the water, yeast, and 1 tsp of sugar in the mixing bowl and let stand for 5 minutes. Add the flour and salt and mix until a ball of dough forms. Roll ball onto a floured counter top and knead for a couple minutes.  2. Put dough in an oiled bowl and let rise for 30 mins in a warm place with a clean cloth draped over top. While your doug

DIY Table Revamp - Guest Post

Hi all! I'm Tiffany from This Motherhood is Brought to You by Xanax and I am so excited to be a part of the Guest Post Swap and to be Amanda's swap partner! I love love love her idea on how to make indoor snowballs with egg cartons. I am definitely going to have to try that with my kiddos since my smallest one has decided that it has to snow for Christmas. Poor baby doesn't know snow is hard to come by in Alabama :( For my guest post I wanted to share a little DIY with you guys that involves duct tape! A few months ago my daughter's little chair that goes with her table she sits at every day tore and she made it worse by pulling all of the stuffing out of the seat! What started out as a quick fix turned into a great idea. She loved her seat so much that she has now decided that her table has look cool too so being the smarty pants that she is, she tore her table!

3 HOME IMPROVEMENT TO MAKE BEFORE MOVING IN

While shifting to your dream house, you may face a mountain of pre-move work, including downsizing, packing, hiring moving trucks, and other help. When you already have a list full of tasks, home improvements for the new house might be the last thing. However, handling the new house renovation before moving in is convenient for you in many ways. Planning home improvement is exciting and stressful both. If you are moving to a house that is not entirely ready, you have massive things to do. To make things smooth, create a list based on priorities. If you are shifting to a freshly build house, you do not need to make a lot of renovation, though you can add a little personal touch to it. When you make house changes before moving in, you can save your floor and furniture from paint spills. You will have an open space to plan the house interior. You can protect yourself and your family from hazardous odors and dust. There are several home improvements like removing popcorn ceil